Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Buttermilk anyone?

Jax and I biked to the store to get some buttermilk.
We were trying a home remedy for an itchy tongue and I have been wanting to show the kids how you can make butter.
Perfect.
It was a nice outing, just Jax and I. We stopped at the park on the way home for a little play.
Once at home I gave Jax the buttermilk in a little medicine cup as I thought it might not taste good to him and it would be more fun this way. He drank it right up!
Then we poured some buttermilk into a jar, let it warm up a bit and started to shake it... everyone was excited to see the butter appear!
We shook.
And we shook.
I wondered what I was doing wrong.
We shook some more.
The kids gave up.
I shook some more.
I phoned my Mom.
She informed me that buttermilk is the by-product of making butter... honey you need to use a thick cream!
This I should have known, in my childhood we made a lot of butter from the milk/cream from our milk cow! We didn't ever click a switch and start milking out buttermilk from her!!!

Anyhow, embarrassment aside, I decided to bake some bran muffins that called for buttermilk... I always have to put vinegar in milk as I never have buttermilk in the house!
Perfect!
We made the muffins. They didn't turn out as good as normal. Oh well.

Jax kept on drinking the buttermilk. His tongue wasn't as itchy.

Then last night I was making a sauce for the pasta and was trying to think how to make it with what I had in fridge and Clayton says, 'Just use that homo milk you have in the fridge, haven't you used it before?'
And I say, 'Yeah I have, but I don't have homo milk in the fridge!'
He pulls out the buttermilk and says, 'yes you do, right here.'
And I say, 'hunny that's buttermilk!'
And he says, 'Then why does it say 3.25% homogenized milk on the carton?' 

Because the people who packaged it are idiots! Because it's in a code that only a women can read! Because I say it's buttermilk, so it's buttermilk. Because I have been feeding it to Jax religiously to help with his itchy tonque. Because I baked a buttermilk recipe with it. 
Because your wife is an idiot!


4 comments:

Anonymous said...

LOL...LOL...LOL...LOL
Kimberly... That's why there was a little bit of buttery stuff in the "so-called" buttermilk....it was that 3.5% of cream in that homo milk. I'll be curious how Jax drinks "real" buttermilk! Glad it helped his itchy tongue! Those muffins will definitely turn out light and fluffy with the real stuff!!!!
Too funny Kimberly. I love it. I can hear Clayton saying just use the milk in the fridge!!! I'm still laughing.
Honey, you really like making the "BEST" memories! I love them!!
MOM :)

Allise said...

Oh my... there are tears running down my face... (and maybe my leg!)

Please know you are not alone in this. I feel like you were writing about me during this short tale. I love it.
I am still laughing.
Thanks for sharing!
XO
A

Vanessa said...

Buttermilk-homo milk.... Same same but different eh?!
What kind of tear were running down your leg Allise! :) pee on a tree, not in your pants! (Sorry, I just read the p is for... Blog)

Allise said...

I just read this one again. So good!
Xo
A